The Power of Listening: Getting Behind People’s Eyeballs (Inspired by Robin Sharma)
I recently delved into Robin Sharma’s insightful book, “Who Will Cry When You Die?” (Shout out to Robin Sharma, wherever you are!), and one particular passage resonated deeply. It speaks to a fundamental human need: the desire to be understood and valued. Sharma emphasizes that in our fast-paced world, we often mistake waiting for someone to finish speaking for true listening. We’re too quick to formulate our responses, neglecting the crucial act of empathy.
Sharma calls this “getting behind people’s eyeballs”—seeing the world from their perspective. It’s about showing genuine care and building trust through deep connection. As the old adage goes, we have two ears and one mouth for a reason: to listen twice as much as we speak. By truly listening, we open ourselves to learning and understanding, gaining insights we’d miss in a self-centered monologue.
Here are some practical tips, gleaned from Sharma’s wisdom, to enhance your listening skills:
- The 60-Second Rule: If you’re the one speaking and your conversational partner hasn’t contributed in a minute, it’s time to pause and invite their input.
- Resist Interruptions: Catch yourself before interrupting and focus on fully absorbing what the other person is saying.
- Take Notes (When Appropriate): In professional settings, note-taking demonstrates genuine interest and respect for the speaker’s words.
- Reflect and Clarify: Before responding, summarize what you’ve heard. For instance, “Just to make sure I understand, are you saying…?” This shows you’re actively engaged and seeking clarity.
A Personal Reflection and a Question
Reading Sharma’s advice, I couldn’t help but notice the consistent use of feminine pronouns (“her,” “she”) when referring to the listener. If I had the chance to speak with Robin Sharma, I’d ask about this choice. Was it intentional? Does it imply a specific context, perhaps focusing on interpersonal dynamics within close relationships?
This observation led me to ponder a broader question: Does Sharma’s advice accurately reflect real-world interactions? Or is it more of an idealized concept, perhaps better suited for online content than the messy realities of daily life?
In my experience, truly listening is a challenging but rewarding skill. It requires conscious effort and a willingness to set aside our own biases and agendas. It’s about creating a space where others feel heard and valued.
I think that Sharma’s advice is great, and if it is applied correctly, it could greatly improve a persons communication and relationships. But i also think the real world is messy, and it is hard to follow those rules all the time.
What are your thoughts? Have you found these listening techniques effective? How do you navigate the complexities of communication in your own life?